2.14.15. The first day Elias voluntarily told me he loves me (while wrapping his little arms tightly around my neck). #daymaker #happyvalentinestome #hesmine
It may have been quiet on the blog recently, but I’ve been blogging… in my head. There are many things I’ve been thinking about, some that I’ve actually started writing about, and none that have actually made it all the way to publishing (oops). I think that time is coming sooner than later though, as writing continues to be an outlet for me to process all that I am experiencing, and, these days, I have no shortage of experiences to process. I just haven’t had the mental bandwidth for much creativity lately. The holidays (we pack in a few extra birthdays, and an anniversary with the Christmas/New Year standards), the transition back to full-time work (after being away 4 months), and many other unique situations and special events have kept my plate full and my bandwidth minimal. It has been a season of celebration and transition, but I’m sure at least some stories and musings will show up here soon enough!
As for today, there are a couple of noteworthy things I thought I’d document (partially because I can’t believe they are real, and writing them here at least makes them exist somewhere outside of my head, ha).
- This morning was the easiest start to a work day that we have had yet. Note: easiest, not easy. Things were far from leisurely over here- but they were peaceable, orderly, and, for the most part, enjoyable. Everyone ended up in the right place with some time to spare and no exasperated “hurry up, we are going to be late”‘s were uttered by mom (see my post about “experiencing mom” for more on that. Oh wait, that’s still in my head too, dang it).
- For the first time, the kids self-divided for play based on gender. The boys played cars in the house, the girls ran around the yard together. This made me pause for a moment of appreciation 1) because everyone was entertained and 2) because Macy and Owen each wanted a brother and sister to play with so badly, and here they were, finally getting to relate and play together just as they’d hoped. #goodtimesahead
- We made it through our Monday walk with just one meltdown and time out and returned home with everyone happy and smiling, without a single diaper blowout. Big deal. Last week I thought we were going to have to quit our Monday walking tradition just to save my sanity, and this week it actually felt like… a walk in the park. Mind you, we aren’t talking about a little jaunt- we are talking about a 5 mile trek that includes dinner by stroller, so the twins have justifiably required some time to get acclimated to this adventure. It seems they have finally decided they like it, and I do too.
Learning this year that living with a spirit of Thanksgiving doesn’t mean dismissing painful and difficult realities or seeing everything through rose-colored glasses. That Thanksgiving and sadness, as it turns out, are not mutually exclusive. That sometimes the things for which we are thankful are also things that we grieve and miss, and things that have come into our lives with some sort of loss attached.
Attempting today to embrace the beauty and brokenness, the nostalgia and longing, the laughter and sadness that seem to be especially muddled and poignant at this time of year. Figuring out how to somehow hold them all at once without dismissing the depth and reality of each of them. Finding there, in that place of being fully present and aware of it all, a thanksgiving that is weighty and, for me, more true.
Thinking today of our Ritz-family (missing your presence around our table and the way your warm hospitality always made every celebration more savory), my grandparents in Vermont (may your last Thanksgiving in the home you have built move extra slow and be extra sweet- how I wish we could be there too!), of Cora and Elias’ family in Uganda (how I miss you on behalf of those kids and how I long to share a table and daily life with you, how I long for your every need to be met and your bellies and hearts to be full of every good thing), of our beloved Dicksons (you are loved and missed more than you know), of all those I love so much and wish I could celebrate with today, of those of you who are hurting and questioning and alone (come to our table!), and of those who have suffered loss this year and who just might be finding it hard to “feel” thankful. May all of our “Thanksgivings” today be more about embracing reality and being present in whatever situation we find ourselves and in that, may we discover the gift of today.
Cora’s new word for the day: thank you! It’s a good word, I think.
Adoption is important to our family, and, truth is, it has been for a long time now. The definition of adoption found in the dictionary says something about “choosing or taking as one’s own” and by this definition, there are many who have been adopted into our family even before Cora and Elias. There are many grandparents, aunts, uncles, brothers, sisters, sons and daughters who bear no blood relation to us but who are family to us nonetheless. This bond of love draws together unrelated things (in this case, people), and offers whatever it has (physical, mental, emotional) for the well being and wholeness of the other. It is life-giving and essential to our growth and development. Adoptive family is powerful, and we all need the sense of security that comes from being known, and loved, and part of something bigger than ourselves. We have experienced this reality ourselves, and we love extending that same reality to others whenever and however possible. Will you join us in doing the same?
You can start by joining in the celebration of the first World Adoption Day next week. To find out how you can participate, click here: http://worldadoptionday.org
May the world be changed and challenged and a little more beautiful as we celebrate a love that sees, knows, chooses, and embraces. It doesn’t get much better than that.
Also big news today (and a sign of increasingly better health), Cora cut a tooth! That makes three teeth in total. Watch out developmental delays… your days are numbered here! We are comin’ after you.
This morning the twins wandered to another room of the house and started playing with toys while I cleaned up from breakfast. That might seem “normal” for most two-year-old kids, but for the last few weeks my kids have been following me around the house whining if I tried to get anything done. The fact that they are starting to venture out a little bit on their own is a sign that they are feeling more comfortable in our home and that they are feeling more securely attached to me. It’s good news.
It’s also good news because it means I can get a few things done around the house (hopefully).